I

I am drowning. I'm scared. I want what will never be. I know it is not good. I do not know how to stop. I let walls crumble when he's around. I have no more control. I'm scared. I let this happen. I can not turn back. I will make it out of this alive. I'm scared. I got too close. I let this happen. I don't think I can handle this. I'm scared. I want to stop. I don't know how. I'm scared. We are friends. I'm scared.

STOP !!!!

i over analyze everything god damn it. I need to stay in control which is amazingly difficult as all of these emotions are rushing around as if my levy just broke. I am too smart for my hearts own good. I will try to keep my distance and maintain what is left of my walls. I WILL stay in control and not repeat my reckless past, at least that's what I'm hoping for.





to another day down...